Duke attempts the Impossible

[duke3016]

I deposited a few bob into bet-at-home for the Euros and after all the games (bar 1 of course) I have some residue in there. Now I can’t withdraw less than €100 (must have something to do with the sign up bonus I took) so in the time honoured tradition of the inveterate gambler I have lumped the lot on Baghdatis to beat Murray at 6.2 

That’ll teach em……

Bugger - looks like an oops 

[duke3016]

I see that the papers are hounding show business people who are avoiding tax. Please note the word here is ‘AVOID’ not ‘EVADE’. It is not illegal and to be honest I don’t hold with the morality argument either. If I could pay less tax, would I, of fecking course I would.

[duke3016]

The human mind ordinarily operates at only ten percent of its capacity -- the rest is overhead for the operating system.                       

[duke3016]

If you are travelling to France by car this year be aware of a new law making it compulsory for drivers to carry two breathalyser kits in their vehicles or risk an on-the-spot fine.  Source: BBC (and of course the hi-viz and triangle are still compulsory)

The biggest winners, the kit manufacturers of which there are only 2 in France

Oh and The drink-driving limit in France is 50mg of alcohol in 100ml of blood - 30mg less than the UK limit.

[sharplea]

Simple - just don't drive in France.

In fact, just don't go to the fecking country unless by Eurostar.

[duke3016]

On-Line poker has the soul of the darkest devil ever to be promulgated from the depths of insanity. It is populated, from within its bowels, by black hearted gnomes of gargantuan ugliness and downright sadism. They delight in building your hopes up with enticing flops only to burst your euphoric feeling of wellbeing by placing 2 suited cards on the end. Not only that but they enter the consciousness of at least one player, who they enslave with a viciousness that Attila the Hun would be proud of. They then make this player think that their pretty 8c7h is invincible. Then they go about proving it by completing 4 clubs on the board.

So you hatch a plan to negate these episodes of mischievous, hate filled actions. You throw caution to the wind and start fooling them by playing the ‘bad’ cards and folding the ‘good’ cards. This confuses them for a while. They huddle beneath the cold stones of the crypt and begin to panic. But their innate viciousness soon comes to the fore as they start letting the oppositions ‘good’ hands stand up.

Not to be outdone you revert to playing with ‘good’ cards, but this time they react quicker than a threatened rattlesnake and fill the ‘bad’ hands. This can be rinsed and repeated for as long as your sanity can stand it.

Me? I have retreated into the realms of particle physics in order to preserve the last shreds of my dignity.

Yep I am typing this on the spare laptop as the main one has just been physically particled.

[cashman]

On-Line poker has the soul of the darkest devil ever to be promulgated from the depths of insanity. It is populated, from within its bowels, by black hearted gnomes of gargantuan ugliness and downright sadism. They delight in building your hopes up with enticing flops only to burst your euphoric feeling of wellbeing by placing 2 suited cards on the end. Not only that but they enter the consciousness of at least one player, who they enslave with a viciousness that Attila the Hun would be proud of. They then make this player think that their pretty 8c7h is invincible. Then they go about proving it by completing 4 clubs on the board.

So you hatch a plan to negate these episodes of mischievous, hate filled actions. You throw caution to the wind and start fooling them by playing the ‘bad’ cards and folding the ‘good’ cards. This confuses them for a while. They huddle beneath the cold stones of the crypt and begin to panic. But their innate viciousness soon comes to the fore as they start letting the oppositions ‘good’ hands stand up.

Not to be outdone you revert to playing with ‘good’ cards, but this time they react quicker than a threatened rattlesnake and fill the ‘bad’ hands. This can be rinsed and repeated for as long as your sanity can stand it.

Me? I have retreated into the realms of particle physics in order to preserve the last shreds of my dignity.

Yep I am typing this on the spare laptop as the main one has just been physically particled.

 

[sharplea]

You twit.

[duke3016]

Well as long as they respect my beliefs! It's not a matter of evidence but of faith. They could start by raiding Daryl Hanna's house if they think evidence is so important. Or her swimming pool.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18692830

[david3103]

Well as long as they respect my beliefs! It's not a matter of evidence but of faith. They could start by raiding Daryl Hanna's house if they think evidence is so important. Or her swimming pool.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18692830

If mermaids don't exist, who was it that invented the t*t-w***?

[duke3016]

Talking about things that don't 'exist'

“The Higgs boson walks into a Catholic church, and the priest says: 'What are you doing here?’ The Higgs says: 'Well, you can’t have mass without me.’”

[duke3016]

Then there’s the one about the Uncertainty Principle, which holds that you can know the position of a particle, or its velocity, but not both. “Schrodinger and Heisenberg are speeding down the motorway, and get stopped by the police. 'Do you know how fast you were going?’ says the officer. 'No,’ says Heisenberg, 'but I can tell you exactly where we are…’”

[duke3016]

Cork tomorrow, looking forward to a weekend of craic amongst friends. So to prepare for this epic journey I need to hone my skills in a tough environment of poker. Yep off to the aquarium 

[duke3016]

The aquarium delivered... AJ << A8  - AQ << 10 8,

Two more people paid up for their flights to Portugal that makes unlucky 13 already with flights booked. Will be talking to Rich over the weekend to book a second Villa. Watch out Portugal you really don't know what will hit you.

[duke3016]

Cork.... Leaving for the airport at around 1pm

[X] Looking forward to it.
[  ] Packed (shouldn't take too long once I get motivated  )

Bring it on