Author Topic: If Carlsberg did dull poker blogs, they'd do this one  (Read 224999 times)

0 Members and 3 Guests are viewing this topic.

duke3016

  • Global Moderator
  • Platinum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10549
    • ChezGer
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #255 on: September 19, 2008, 23:25:52 PM »
6 FTW and go on the piss -- it works for me

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #256 on: September 20, 2008, 10:35:19 AM »
I"m manning the council information point in Dereham library today which means I should be dealing with face to face enquiries about council services. Things have been slow so far, so to keep myself occupied I"ve been looking on Expedia and KLM"s websites at the cost of Vegas holidays. I can"t afford it, so why am I torturing myself? Someone stop me.    
   Those stud stables really had better start being a bit kinder to me before I start looking at that stuff again.
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #257 on: September 21, 2008, 09:20:13 AM »

Oh dear god, this just isn"t funny. I"ve successfully managed to push my loss for the week over the two times buy in mark and in the last two hours I"ve played ten hands where I"ve been in the lead on sixth street only to lose on seventh. Funniest bad beat of the lot was when, on sixth street I had two pair (aces and tens) and a royal flush draw (card needed for royal and six others of same suit not yet exposed) but was defeated on seventh street by an opponent who completed a ten-high straight with the only ten left in the deck. Its a good job I"ve got my curtains closed as my neighbours may otherwise have seen the top of my head lift off and steam come out of my ears a la Tom and Jerry.
  I"ve got a day off playing tomorrow so that leaves me to think about my plans for next week. My options are as follows:

1) Give up poker and walk down the road to Mecca bingo
2) Do exactly the same as this week, after all I cant be this unlucky two weeks running, can I?
3) Drop back down a level, allow my blood pressure return to normal levels and try the step up again in a couple of weeks.
4) Reintroduce a little tournament play into the mix
5) Give up stud altogether and return to a diet of deepstack holde"em tourneys
6) Smash my PC into a million pieces  
7) Find religion and decide that gambling is the work of Satan
8) Stop bloody whinging, bad beat stories are also, without exception, all created within the depths of hell
9) Try to execute a cunning yet fiendishly difficult mystery plan


Another week begins and I"ve decided the plan this time round is somewhere between points three and four. Last week was an interesting experiment, but was not a good blueprint to follow. It was a bit like deciding that as you like eating ice cream you want to eat nothing but ice cream for seven days. Its something you like a lot, but a lack of variety in your diet makes you sick of the stuff. Therefore, this weeks scheme will involve lots of stud play at the level to which I"ve become accustomed, but this time I will add in a couple of tournaments to add a bit of variety.  
 On a completely different tack, a good indicator of my mindset came in the unlikely guise of a trip to my local Asda. I tend to take my own plastic bags to reuse. I"ve got enough of Asda"s own bags to comfortably accomodate my regular shop, but I actually took ones that were emblazoned with "Mandalay Bay","Ballys", "Welcome to Las Vegas" and, err, this one ruins the pattern, "Monkeyworld". Can anyone see a pattern?    
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

Santino67

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 2650
  • Fat Charlie Sheen - @GrantSpeirs
    • Bebo & Facebook
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #258 on: September 21, 2008, 09:31:37 AM »
I"m sure 7 & 8 are good options Simon  :D Seriously, IMO I think you should stick with it again for another week if it"s not too stressful on your bankroll. Think you may just have run into poor cards/luck/timing last week. Might be worth another pop if your confidence hasn"t been damaged.
APAT Scottish Amateur Champion 2011 :~)
APAT Online North America PLO Champion 2011
Chipaccrual's Big APAT Christmas End Of Year Quiz Champion 2011
2012 Scottish Captain @ ECOAP
APAT Online Irish PLO Champion 2013
APAT Online Scottish Champion 2017

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #259 on: September 21, 2008, 10:10:34 AM »

I"m sure 7 & 8 are good options Simon  :D Seriously, IMO I think you should stick with it again for another week if it"s not too stressful on your bankroll. Think you may just have run into poor cards/luck/timing last week. Might be worth another pop if your confidence hasn"t been damaged.


I thought at some length about sticking at the higher level and I genuinely believe that I played well enough to have finished in profit given the rub of the green. However, I"m still very new to the idea of basing my poker playing time around cash play, so I think I need to do a little fine tuning. I haven"t yet hit upon the magic formula for keeping myself at my mental peak all for a sustained period, but at least last week has pointed me towards the idea that seven days of nothing but cash stud isn"t the answer. I will be trying the step up again sooner rather than later, but thought that I needed to do something different this time.        
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #260 on: September 21, 2008, 21:25:30 PM »

Oh dear god, this just isn"t funny. I"ve successfully managed to push my loss for the week over the two times buy in mark and in the last two hours I"ve played ten hands where I"ve been in the lead on sixth street only to lose on seventh. Funniest bad beat of the lot was when, on sixth street I had two pair (aces and tens) and a royal flush draw (card needed for royal and six others of same suit not yet exposed) but was defeated on seventh street by an opponent who completed a ten-high straight with the only ten left in the deck. Its a good job I"ve got my curtains closed as my neighbours may otherwise have seen the top of my head lift off and steam come out of my ears a la Tom and Jerry.
  I"ve got a day off playing tomorrow so that leaves me to think about my plans for next week. My options are as follows:

1) Give up poker and walk down the road to Mecca bingo
2) Do exactly the same as this week, after all I cant be this unlucky two weeks running, can I?
3) Drop back down a level, allow my blood pressure return to normal levels and try the step up again in a couple of weeks.
4) Reintroduce a little tournament play into the mix
5) Give up stud altogether and return to a diet of deepstack holde"em tourneys
6) Smash my PC into a million pieces  
7) Find religion and decide that gambling is the work of Satan
8) Stop bloody whinging, bad beat stories are also, without exception, all created within the depths of hell
9) Try to execute a cunning yet fiendishly difficult mystery plan


When I woke up this morning, I thought the plan for this week would be an amalgamation of points three and four. I wanted to play a gentle hold"em tournament tonight to reintroduce myself to the game then spend most of the week rebuilding my bank balance on the stud cash tables. The tournament I chose was the $5.50, $15000 guaranteed affair on Pokerstars starting at 18.00 which I"ve previously had some success in. I haven"t played in this competition for a few months and after tonight I don"t think I will again. There were 4896 entries and I"ve discovered just how far my attitude has changed. I didn"t enjoy playing tonight one jot. I"m not about to tell a bad beat story or regale you with some other tale of woe, but I found myself mind numbingly bored. I just couldn"t figure out why I was sitting down for a tournament which was likely to continue into the early hours without having the possibility of winning sufficient to make me at least consider telling my employers to take my job description, roll it up and use it as a suppository. This has given me a change of heart and I have decided that this week I will go for option nine, the "Cunning yet fiendishly difficult mystery plan". Before I reveal the exact details of said plan, a little background..........
  For about the first eighteen months after I was taught this game, my poker education came about solely through playing and trying to learn from experience. I then bought "Harrington on Hold'em" and it made an instant improvement in my game. Where I"d been creeping into the lower reaches of tournament payouts, I started making final tables. Since then, I"ve played live a bit, read a few more books, watched Stoxpoker videos and gradually improved.
  The early stages of my serious stud playing have felt very much like my early days of hold"em. I"ve played lots and have tweaked my game to take account of things I"ve worked out on the virtual tables. I think my skills, if not my finances, allow me to move slightly higher up the ladder, but I have hit a couple of snags. Firstly, there are very few sites where there are sufficient stud players to guarantee the availability of a game at all times. In addition, stud tournaments are as good as non-existent which I regard as a major handicap.  Secondly, there is very little literature or wisdom I can tap into to help my game.
  I have borrowed a copy of "Super System 2" and was disappointed that even this doesn"t have a chapter on stud high, although Todd Brunson has contributed a piece on stud high/low. Likewise, Stoxpoker"s video library seems to have a number of stud high/low films but nothing on stud high only. I certainly don"t intend reverting to being predominantly a hold"em player, I"ve done too well recently for that to be an option, but do have some thinking to do.    
  So on to the precise details of my fiendishly difficult to execute master plan and if anyone ever tells me they know exactly what I"m about to type, you are a liar. My plan starts with immersing myself in the aforementioned "Super systems 2". I will also make use of Stox"s resources and here comes the radical bit..............Once I shut down my computer tonight, I will not play a single hand of online poker of any form until next Sunday. You may care to read that last sentence a second time. My reason for coming to this conclusion is that I believe that playing hour after hour of poker without time for review can be as much of a hindrance as a help. I think the time has come for me and poker to have a bit of time away from each other in order to rekindle our enthusiasm for each other.    
 Will I manage to hold out for seven days? Mmm, we'll see. Watch this space. 
   
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #261 on: September 23, 2008, 18:18:52 PM »
Two days into myself self-imposed week-long poker ban and I"m still not sure if I"ll last the distance. Last night wasn"t too much of an issue as I was out for part of it. But tonight? I"m home from work, I"ve had my tea and there"s nothing on TV I fancy watching. What am I supposed to do with myself if I"m not playing poker?
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

Swinebag

  • Staker Licensed Player
  • Platinum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4033
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #262 on: September 23, 2008, 21:01:09 PM »

Two days into myself self-imposed week-long poker ban and I"m still not sure if I"ll last the distance. Last night wasn"t too much of an issue as I was out for part of it. But tonight? I"m home from work, I"ve had my tea and there"s nothing on TV I fancy watching. What am I supposed to do with myself if I"m not playing poker?


poker million is on at 10.
read poker books untill then
Quote from: Chipaccrual
Rob, you are a genius.
Quote from: jacklevel06
You are a genius Rob  :D

duke3016

  • Global Moderator
  • Platinum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10549
    • ChezGer
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #263 on: September 23, 2008, 21:19:22 PM »


Two days into myself self-imposed week-long poker ban and I"m still not sure if I"ll last the distance. Last night wasn"t too much of an issue as I was out for part of it. But tonight? I"m home from work, I"ve had my tea and there"s nothing on TV I fancy watching. What am I supposed to do with myself if I"m not playing poker?


poker million is on at 10.
read poker books untill then




monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #264 on: September 23, 2008, 22:38:29 PM »
Without logging onto any poker site, my poker ego has suddenly become inflated. The reason? I won my last home game. Whilst this in itself doesn"t sound like much, the field included the player officially the 6th best amateur in the world who has also now been selected for the England side for the forthcoming international tournament. Surely this means that all the top poker sites will start a bidding war to make me their next sponsored pro?
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #265 on: September 24, 2008, 20:26:07 PM »
This poker exile is getting silly. Tonight I"ve been putting up new curtains and worst of all, hoovering. This is complete,madness. How am I supposed to maintain that lovingly crafted bachelor pad/hovel look I"ve maintained all these years if I actually clean the place. Bring back poker I say.  
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

ibis

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 20
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #266 on: September 24, 2008, 21:04:00 PM »

This poker exile is getting silly. Tonight I"ve been putting up new curtains and worst of all, hoovering. This is complete,madness. How am I supposed to maintain that lovingly crafted bachelor pad/hovel look I"ve maintained all these years if I actually clean the place. Bring back poker I say. 


What colour are the curtains?

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #267 on: September 24, 2008, 21:19:33 PM »


This poker exile is getting silly. Tonight I"ve been putting up new curtains and worst of all, hoovering. This is complete,madness. How am I supposed to maintain that lovingly crafted bachelor pad/hovel look I"ve maintained all these years if I actually clean the place. Bring back poker I say. 


What colour are the curtains?


Blue,red floral pattern on a cream background and bought from a charity shop for the vast sum of £1.50.
  I"m surprised you"re still talking to us mere mortals with your elevation to status of national team member, not to mention your new day job as West Ham manager. Seeing as I am the current WSOP (Norfolk) bracelet holder, I am happy to offer my services as your poker coach ahead of your trip to Brighton. My fee is negotiable but I think you"ll find it will be very reasonable.  
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

monkeyman

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1352
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #268 on: September 25, 2008, 22:26:43 PM »
Tonight was the final time that temptation was likely to make me break my vow of poker abstinence and I"m glad to report I resisted. Tomorrow I"m having a lager or five, then saturday I"ve got a few things on, so I"ll think I"ll manage to last a couple more days. I think this has been a hugely worthwhile exercise as I feel as though I"ve learnt an enormous amount, both in terms of hands/situations to play and mental approach. I can"t wait to test a few things out next week. I"ll go back to the cash tables on sunday, stud will still make up the bulk of my playing time, but most of my learning has related to no limit hold"em tournament play, so that"s where I"ll be experimenting a lot over the weeks to come. Should be an interesting ride.
Currently tearing the Ipoker anonymous tables a new one

ibis

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 20
Re: Am I a fish or what?
« Reply #269 on: September 26, 2008, 12:24:32 PM »

I won my last WSOP (Norwich) game. Whilst this in itself doesn"t sound like much

Yes, Monkeyman did indeed win the latest WSOP (Norwich) event, a tournament so prestigious, entry is restricted to monkeyman, relatives of monkeyman and spouses of relatives of monkeyman. It has its own bejewelled bracelet and as you can see from the photo below, is always conducted in the most serious and professional manner.

hmm...doesn"t want to let me attach the photo - is this forum software so clever it can scan photos and decide they are too scary for public viewing? Anyone know why it won"t let me attach a little jpg or gif?