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A few years on and a crushed heart mended. Who woulda thunk it possible? Lucky.com much?As you may have gathered, there have been some new developments in Laxieland. Totally unexpected but very much of the "excellent" variety. Never in a month of Sundays saw this coming and did all in my power to make sure I wouldn"t fall for anyone again. But turns out, not all falls are bad ones. And sometimes it takes a bad fall to find that special someone who picks you up, dusts you off and says, "It"s going to be ok." I swore I"d never let anyone break the wall to my heart again. But things change with time...and so have I. And the wall has been well and truly broken. Go figure.
Obviously the family knows or it wouldn"t be posted here. As happy as I am personally, it wasn"t easy. We"d 22 years of life put down together and that"s no small shake. A tough few chats were had. First was with Timothy last week....and then the kids at the week-end. We all knew it was coming eventually but Sarah said it best, "I"m just glad I don"t have to wonder "when" any more."
Not going to get too deep into the family side of it right now. Who said what and how we all reacted is between us. Maybe some day, looking back I"ll decide it needs saying. But for now...enough"s been said. Timothy and I lost that special bond between us, as a couple, a long while ago. But we"ve something more precious than that in our three kids. And regardless of anything else, those three will be protected and nurtured by both of us, as a team, for as long as we"re both alive. Won"t always be under the same roof, but we"ll never be too far away. Regardless of what the future holds, that much we agree on completely. My wish is that we"ll all be able to look back with pride on how we handled things when our directions in life changed. Nothing in life is certain. God knows I"ve learned that lesson - big style. But I"m fairly certain we"ll manage that wish. Despite everything, we"re a good lot really.
Now then. A brief musical interlude while I go hoover and mop the floors.
So who is this insane man who"s decided it might be ok to put up with me and more importantly, managed to get me to "feel" again?I"ll give ya some clues....Has a heart of pure gold - mine was broke, but he"d LOTS of super glue.He"s a member of blonde and APAT - so am I! Go figure.He"s a bit quiet - yeah...I know. We won"t go there.
With the last couple of years I"ve been pretty much going through the motions of day to day life smiling and laughing away as much as I could. And everyone bought it. At least I think they did. It"s been a roller coaster. That"s for sure. But just like a roller coaster there were twists and turns of different varieties. Sometimes life was fun, other times scary. And a time or two where I just didn"t want to be there. All the while there was one "constant". No man was ever going to have hold of my heart again. Chatting away on MSN to various people helped A LOT. Sure, they"d try to bring me around a bit but I"d change the subject. Made it my mission to try and help fix them because I didn"t need fixing...my mind was already made up. I was often busy trying to hook up this person with that one, while thinking to myself..."Fools! Do they not know it"ll only end up in ruin?! well...if that"s what they want, I"ll do what I can to help." If there wasn"t a match to try and sort or reassurance to be dished out, I"d go on a rant about silly random stuff. Anything at all to change the subject.
So in among all of these people there was this one guy. A lovely Lad. We"ve known each other for a few years now, but we"d never really gone down the road of any sort of truly personal chats. He"s a bit shy and I don"t do personal so much. "Says she as she spills the lot on a diary." Yes this diary gets a bit too "personal" for some readers. But to be fair, it only holds a tiny fraction of what spins around in my head.
Fast forward to Newcastle APAT. Normally I wouldn"t even entertain that event because it"s such a pain in the backside to get there. But it was Easter week-end and the Irish take their religious holidays serious. They were short a player or two and needed me to fill a spot on the team. Normally they"d have a fierce strong player base to chose from so this was probably going to be my only shot at a spot on the team. And I"m not very religious so that wasn"t an issue. Sigh. Go on then. I"m in.Well, ye got the bones of a trip report - but I left some detail out. The most important part if truth be told. Mainly because I was in shock. This couldn"t be happening. Out of nowhere and when I least expected it, this quiet gentle man managed to sneak his way past the wall I"d built and got around all the broken bits while he was at it. It took me nearly a week to accept the fact that the ice queen had melted and Jack (technolog) was responsible for it.Still can"t figure out how he managed it. Keep running events back in my head and there was nothing to suggest he and I would ever be a couple. We"re like night and day. He"s sensible and I"m a nutter. He"s a bit quiet and I"m not. Well, that"s not entirely true. You lot generally see the "class clown" version of Laxie. But as he"s discovered, there is a quiet side to me too...just took some digging to find it and he did. How good does he run?! lol Truth be told...I don"t care now how he managed it. Just delighted he did. Couldn"t be happier and feel so very lucky right now it"s unreal.Call it fate or call the doctor for the poor man...either way - we"re hooked. xx
So there ya have it folks. Somebody tell Tighty it"s safe to come out and play again. Poor man has been sat next to a bucket with the bones of a week now while news trickled out around FB land. And Ger? He"s upgraded from a bucket to a skip at this stage with all the loved up messages around the place. rotflmfao
Hello you!The secret"s out then? As Dawn might say - sorry Claire - whoda thunk it? I"ve known Dawn, I would guess, for around three or four years. Well, not so much "known" as "known of". We finally started to get to know each other a little chatting on MSN around a year or so ago, probably by dint of the fact we"re both good mates with the legend that is Ger, Theduke. We"ve had some long and, contrary to what Dawn said, I thought quite personal chats. But they were always perfectly above-board so to speak, just friends chatting, never even the merest hint of flirting. I"d be lying if I said Dawn had never entered my thoughts in a more than platonic way - I"m a man ffs and she"s a very attractive girl. But it"s fair to say that "we" was something that had never been on either agenda.Then Newcastle comes.God knows what happened (can you ask him please kin?). As Dawn says, I"m a quiet type, until I get to know you. I"m also quite painfully shy with women. I think the Friday night at Newcastle, when our relationship "progressed" must have been a bit of a "perfect storm". I"d had a fair amount to drink , just enough to reduce my inhibitions whilst maintaining a workable level of coherence. Dawn insists that I made the first move. Coherent or not, I can"t remember . It certainly doesn"t sound like me. But if I did, I quite like the line I used Anyway whatever the whys and wherefores, the line worked, despite my best attempts to scupper things (thanks Geo ) and the rest, as they say, is history.We spent the next three days together, pretty much inseperable. It was during these 72 hours I discovered there was more to Dawn than she normally allows you to see and, my God, it was stunning. Nothing physical, purely emotional. I was bought and sold. Obviously, we played it cool outwardly, but it seems we were both thinking along similar lines. We"d met someone special.We chatted increasingly often during the next few days, culminating in an amusing negotiation on the Thursday following Newcastle, nailing down the do s and don"t s of our relationship.Now here we are, not even three weeks after "meeting", and it"s clear we want to spend the rest of our lives together. Wow. There, I said it!Whirlwind romance much?
Congrats - have a lovely life together. (If you"ve been trying to think of an appropriate way of thanking me for inviting Dawn to play for the Ireland team, thereby changing your life for ever, used tenners never offend.)
